Death and Dying in 2020

Hello Friend, I hope you are taking good care of yourself, even if only in moments.

Because we are in turbulent times and we require our own kind, caring attention now more than ever.  For many of us, what was once certain is now uncertain. What was stable, is unstable. What was known is now unknown. What was reliable is unreliable. Our pre-March 2020 ways of being in the world are dying.

I have the great fortune to be a participant in Dying School, facilitated by Dr. Martha Jo Atkins, and Glee, who was diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer eight months ago. Glee is dying, and she is including us with her as her dying continues. She is supporting Dying School students to observe, ask questions about, and better understand what happens in dying. She is answering questions. She is openly sharing her experience, which is ever-changing. She is exemplifying how  to die with presence and agency. Some of what we are observing in Glee's experience is:

  how to say goodbye
  how to clean up loose ends
  how to be let go of what is not in our control
  how to be with what is unwanted and uncomfortable
  how to grieve
  how to be with what is most important
  how to be present while dying, head on, with all of its messiness
  and much much more.

Through this process a lot of things are bubbling up among class participants. Our own suffering, grief and losses, our resistance and fear, our wishes and desires. We are coming to expand our capacity for suffering, and also for love. This is what Dying School is about. 

We can do this. We can be in these turbulent times. We can let go of the ways of being that are dissolving. We can grieve them. We can hone in on what is most essential. We can take good care of what and who is most important, including ourselves. We don't have to wait until the end. We can do this right now. 

Take good care friends. And if you'd like, feel free to inquire within: 

What has died/is dying in 2020? What is being born?

Feeling through the turbulence with you,

Mara